On Choosing the Right Words
Posted October 19, 2011 by
I gave my first interview about THE RULES OF INHERITANCE yesterday, to an editor at BlackBook Magazine. (Yes, if you’re wondering, I do write about restaurants and hotels for their online guide.) They’re going to be featuring a little write-up about me and my book in the January issue of the magazine, which is very exciting.
In any case, this was my first interview, presumably of many, or at least some, hopefully and I couldn’t help but get really nervous before and during the phone call. I can’t really describe how it quite feels to have this intensely personal book out there in so many people’s hands. So talking to someone that I don’t really know who has read this intimate work of mine is quite strange. It’s so very one-sided. They know all of my most vulnerable life moments and personal details, and every word I’m saying is being recorded to fit into a little write-up that even more people will see.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s absolutely thrilling and dream-come-true-ing and all those things too. It’s just also a little nerve-wracking. I want to make sure I say the right things and come off intelligently, or at the very least make sure that I’m making sense.
The thing I’m terrible at is summarizing the book. A while back Greg suggested the line, “It’s a memoir about overcoming the loss of both of my parents.” But every time I say that I feel compelled to add a bunch of stuff like–
“it’s also kind of about coming of age…”
“and about my tumultous twenties…”
“and it’s about relationships and grief and it’s kind of edgy too…”
And usually by the time I’ve thrown a few more sentences around it, both the person I’m speaking to and myself are usually left feeling a little awkward. It’s just not an easy book to sum up and sometimes telling people what it’s about can be a conversation stopper.
For instance I was in an airport recently talking to a man next to me and he asked what I do. I told him that I’m a writer and he naturally asked what I write. I told him that my first book was coming out next year and his eyes lit up. “Oh, that’s exciting,” he said. “What’s it about?” And of course that’s when I stalled. We’d been having a nice conversation but suddenly I was about to tell him that my parents both died of cancer. Either that’s going to make him feel sad for me or in general, or it will simply make him uncomfortable, OR it will open up a much deeper conversation about life and death and all kinds of things.
Do you see what I mean? Things just get a little intense the moment I begin talking about the book and my point is that I’m still trying to figure out how to handle it all. Granted, it’s not a bad problem to have, just one that’s kind of strange. Whenever I get too overwhelmed though I just think about my friend Jillian and how she has to tell people that her memoir is about how she was in a harem belonging to the Prince of Brunei.
Anyway, I’m working on it. And I suppose that each time I have to do it I’ll get a little better. Any advice?
A Heart-Shaped Friendship
Write: A Doe Bay WorkshopFiled under: The Rules of Inheritance, Writing by Claire Bidwell Smith
11 Comments
check out Lidia Yuknavich’s The Chronology of Water – and then check out her press.
Comment by pamela on October 19, 2011 at 6:04 pm
Tricky! I don’t envy you, having to explain it. Depending on what your next book’s about, maybe you could temper it by explaining the topic of the second one?
I used to find a similar thing when I was writing more fiction and people asked me what I wrote about. Old people with Alzheimer’s and dementia was often the answer. People were never sure how to respond. But then I wonder whether it’s a good thing to make talking about these kind of things more normal…
Comment by Sophie on October 19, 2011 at 9:00 pm
I haven’t read your book (obv), but I’ve been reading your blog for awhile. This is what I thought I might say as I was reading above about your difficulty summarizing the book: “It’s a story about losing my parents when I was in my 20s and what happened when I kept on living”
Comment by Erin @ small things on October 20, 2011 at 5:43 am
Ooh, that’s good. Thanks Erin!
Comment by Claire Bidwell Smith on October 20, 2011 at 9:07 am
Glad you can relate, Sophie. I think talking about my next book would make things even worse though — it’s about the afterlife!
Comment by Claire Bidwell Smith on October 20, 2011 at 9:08 am
Hahahahaaaaa (Sorry — that was as a result of envisioning your explanation of the “afterlife” theme in your next book)
I have that same exact fumble/stumble/mumble thing going on when people ask what I do. I have *got* to come up with a good one-sentence answer. One of these days.
For you, however, I think Erin just about hit the nail on the head. And soon you will be so well-known that your household name will ring an immediate bell, even with complete strangers in airports
Comment by Carroll on October 20, 2011 at 5:18 pm
Oh, man. This is the hardest part, for sure. I still get the sweats when people ask me what my book is about. I’m so jealous of fiction writers who can hide behind their characters; it’s a much scarier thing to open yourself up so publicly. It’s scary to do it in interviews with journalists and in some ways even scarier to do it one-on-one with people you’ve just met. But having a schtick makes a huge difference. I like Erin’s line, especially bringing in the fact that you lost your parents in your twenties.
Comment by Suzanne Morrison on October 20, 2011 at 8:11 pm
Also: I can’t wait to meet you in LA and hear all about this Afterlife project of yours!!!
Comment by Suzanne Morrison on October 20, 2011 at 8:12 pm
Suzanne, you’re going to have to give me some tips in person when we meet!
Comment by Claire Bidwell Smith on October 26, 2011 at 10:01 am
Thanks, Carroll! Maybe I should call you and try out different synopses.
Comment by Claire Bidwell Smith on October 26, 2011 at 10:02 am
[...] last month when I expressed anxiety over having given my first interview? Well, the piece I was interviewed for just came out in the latest issue of BlackBook Magazine and [...]
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