It's been four months since I started my Good Enough Project. I've been so lax about mentioning it lately that I think I should recap:
Around the beginning of October I started feeling like everything in my life was sort of getting the good enough treatment. As in, I'm doing a good enough job at work. A good enough job at being a wife. A good enough job at blogging. And on and on. At the time it felt like the only thing that I was at all making a full effort to do a great job at was being a mom, and even then I still feel like there is room for improvement.
Well, it's been four months since I vowed to get things back on track, so I thought it would be a good time to check in. There's been substantial improvement in a few areas (I sold a book! I took a weekend trip with my highschool girlfriends! Greg and I got a little grown-up trip to NYC!), but overall I'm still not satisfied with how the various parts of my life are thriving. Or should I say, not thriving.
A lot of the problem has to do with the fact that my year started off with a bang, er, book contract, and this kind of threw any sort of routine out the window. Whatever precious time I'd been allocating for things like yoga, self-reflective baths and my feeble attempts to create a consistent meditation practice fell to the wayside as I was suddenly forced to prioritize writing time. I have just about a month before I have to send in the first draft of the book to my editor and every spare minute of my time right now is spent making sure that is going to happen.
I know, I know. This is a big deal and I should just remind myself that in a month I'll have more time for healthy interpersonal improvement. But the thing is that I'm kind of in need of it now. I also don't really believe that there is going to be that much more time once the book is done. We're moving across the country in a few months and there will be lots to do to prepare.
I guess I can't help but wonder if being a mother means that I'm going to spend the rest of my days trying to balance all the parts of my life. Does being a parent mean that you never have enough time for yourself? Does it have to mean that? I'd like to think no. I'd like to think that even though these toddler years are demanding, there is still a way to make sure I am replenishing the rest of my life too.
I don't have the answers to these questions but talking helps. Thanks for listening.
My name is Claire and I'm having a hard time balancing everything.