Posted December 31, 2009 by
So I spent a couple of hours yesterday working on a really long year-in-review post that I just deleted in its entirety. It’s been that kind of year, I guess.
For the last three years I’ve spent a lot of time during the very last days of December writing and reflecting on the previous twelve months.
It’s usually a pretty interesting experience to look back on all that
has happened in a 12 month span. It’s always a lot more than I realize. But something about doing it this year felt particularly self-indulgent.
This is the year in which I have given myself over to another person. I would like to say that I did that when I got married. But I didn’t. And really, if I had, it probably wouldn’t have been a good thing.
Earlier, as I spent time writing about each of the last twelve months it just felt like a silly exercise in vanity. The thing is that for as complicated as Veronica has made my life, she’s made it a lot more simple too. Life is a lot less about me, a good thing.
Tonight Greg and I took my desk down to the garage so that we could expand the front of our apartment and make more room for Veronica to have a place to play. It felt so symbolic — my giving up of my writing center to create living space for my daughter.
But I have to remind myself that I haven’t given up writing, I haven’t given up who I am, rather I’m just squishing myself into new shapes and corners, while at the same time opening up my whole person to another.
And she’s more than worth it.
This is the year my daughter was born.
Wishing everyone out there a joyous and abundant new year. Thanks for sharing some of this last one with me.
And I don’t actually expect any of you to watch this, but I really enjoyed making this photo montage of 2009.