How Baby-Wearing Saved My Marriage

Greg Ergo

Now that we're six months in, it's pretty funny to look back on
those first few weeks of parenting. Greg and I just didn't get it. She wants to be held ALL the time?
Surely not. Here, change her diaper. No, stick this pacifier in the
mouth. She spit it out? Is she hungry? I thought she just ate. Try just
putting her down in the bassinet. Ohhh no, that doesn't work.

The
only thing that kept Veronica happy was if we just held her in our arms
and walked around the house. Seriously. I know you people without kids
out there are thinking we must have been doing something wrong. But you
people with kids are totally nodding your heads. You know. The
girl would not let us sit down. We had to be walking. It was like some
new-fangled form of Chinese water torture; all we wanted to do was
sleep and all she wanted us to do was walk.

When she was about
6 weeks old we discovered that the only way to get her to fall asleep
at night was for one of us to slowly walk around the darkened house
with her in our arms. At first she would look every which way, turning
her head to take in the shadows around her. And then little by little
her body would grow heavier, her arms slack at her sides and then
eventually her head would nod, her breathing slowly evening out.

We
had to take turns at this walking around thing because she's kind of
heavy. You might not think 10 or 15 pounds is a lot to carry around,
but try doing it for 30 minutes when you're SLEEP DEPRIVED. It's like
you're moving into your first post-college apartment all over again and
you're too cheap to hire movers so you totally assumed you would be
fine carrying the futon up 5 flights of stairs, but now you're stuck on
the third floor with that thing, trying to maneuver it around the bend
in the stairs, and all you can think is man, one day I'm going to be like an adult and I'll pay people to do this for me. Yup, just like that.

So
anyway, we had to take turns because she was so heavy. And maybe we got
a little resentful of each other in the process since whoever wasn't
doing the baby carrying got to lay in bed with a book, looking up every
5 minutes or so as the baby-carrying parent walked slowly past the door
with Veronica. Usually whoever was carrying the baby would try to catch
your eye as they walked past, shooting you a death stare that loosely
translated as, Yeah, you enjoy that book for like 5 more minutes and then this is ALL you. Oh, those were the days.

Oh, wait. Those are still the days.

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